Sidestory:
Gather Ye Rosebuds
by Emiko
Gather ye rosebuds while ye may,
Old Time is still a-flying,
And this same flower that smiles to-day
To-morrow will be dying.
~Robert Herrick
Perdix was waiting. He had been waiting for months. The mere thought of waiting any longer brought a shudder to his feathers. The grandfather clock in the hall outside Sophie's room chimed once, twice, thrice, and continued its excrutiating ticking. Where was Sophie? Sheets of rain pelted the window, adding to the discordian symphony. The crooning notes of a Barry White song were just barely audible from the downstairs stereo where Sophie's mother was cleaning. Perdix was nestled down in a nest made from Sophie's sheets -- the soft off-white linen was Sophie's favorite -- listening to all the noise and contemplating life.
A crack of lightning lit the room up almost to the point of daylight. It must have struck somewhere very nearby, for the roll of thunder that followed seemed simultaneous to the electrical reaction. By counting the seconds between the light and sound, Perdix could estimate the distance to the lightning, but this one was too close to measure beyond the words "very close." He dearly wished Sophie would arrive home soon.
As if on cue, footsteps sounded on the stairs. Clomp, clomp, clomp. Though she was just a little more than a hundred pounds, Sophie's footsteps could shake the house to the rafters when she chose. Now she just sounded tired. Tired was good. It was better than angry, which was the way Sophie often entered the room and generally resulted in Perdix being ousted.
"Good afternoon, Sophia," Perdix chimed immediately upon her entering the door.
Sophie was not nearly as formal, rebounding with a simple, "Hey, bird." She walked forward to the bed and launched herself into its springy confines. The resulting trampoline effect sent Perdix sprawling onto her back. His wings flapped uselessly a few times. Sophie's eyes narrowed. "Get off me," she demanded.
"I'm sorry -- I just got thrown up into the air, that's all." He finally managed to right himself and return to his haphazard throne.
"Yeah, well, watch yourself in the future."
She rolled over onto her back, staring up at the ceiling of her room. It was adorned with glowing stars from when she was twelve and had actually wanted glowing stars on her ceiling. Now they seemed silly and childish, but she left them up anyway. Once in a while the adhesive on one would loosen from mildew and age, causing a star to fall. Then Sophie would stand on the bed and put it back up to cover the stain on the ceiling where it had originated. One of these days she would paint the ceiling again, and then all the stars would be gone, taking with them their nasty adhesive that left little yellow patches on the otherwise pristine surface.
Sophie rolled again, to her left this time, and collided with Perdix. He let out a disgruntled squawk and flapped his wings. She sat up quickly, her face growing ever more cross, her hand reaching over to knock him from the bed. "What are you doing on my bed anyway? You know I don't like you up here!"
"It's cold today because of the rain!"
"Look at this -- my sheets! Ugh, they smell of partridge!"
"Sophia, please don't be like that, I love you!"
They both froze. Perdix's eyes widened as much as they could and he took an involuntary step backward. Sophie seemed not to understand or hear properly at first, and asked him, "What?"
Though it had been accidental, perhaps now was as good as ever. They would never get a perfect moment -- his luck was not that strong. So he gulped, steadied himself, and said again, "I love you. I've been wanting to tell you for so long, I-- I--"
His composure broke. He shrunk down within the space that was himself and gazed up at her fearfully.
If she had been slightly angry before, it vanished, and was replaced by a disdainful sneer, more malicious than mad. "What brings this on?"
In fear, he babbled more than spoke. "I love you, and I always have, and I always will!" He wanted to add the words, "Please say you love me, too," but didn't.
"You're a partridge."
"I'm not a partridge! Well, I am, but..." Despite his best attempts, Perdix's mind could not come up with a convincing way to finish that argument.
"You're a partridge," she began again, "a smelly little bird. Only you're not that little; you're pretty fat for a bird. You don't even fly much. You're a pet, only you're mine because nobody else would take you because you also happen to be annoying." Her tirade finished, Sophie looked down at him expectantly. Perdix said nothing and looked at the floor. "Well?"
Finally: "Does it really matter so much that I'm a bird?"
"I don't know, why don't you tell me, bird. You're a pretty smart bird and don't make much of a mess, but you're also a pretty dumb bird, thinking that a human girl would fall in love with you. Especially since you are you, with all that entails."
Letting out an anguished cry, Perdix fled from the room. After him, Sophie yelled, "Good riddance!" and slammed her door shut. Perdix's path took him down the stairwell and into the living room, where he ran into Sophie's mother's legs.
The crying stopped, the bird was quiet, and the human woman considered him. "I don't understand why she keeps a pet she doesn't even like," Sophie's mother finally concluded, reaching down to pick Perdix up. She wanted to be comforting, but Perdix didn't want to be comforted. He yelped and squirmed. "Shh, Perdy. Did Sophie hurt you or did you leave a mess on her bed? Oh, dear, I hope you didn't, because then I'd have to clean it up."
No, I didn't leave a mess on the bed, you dumb woman! Let me go! I want OUT! He wheedled himself free from her grasp and landed with a thump on the hardwood floor. That was going to hurt later on. Waddling towards the door, he began to peck at it. This was a signal she could understand.
Sophie's mother crossed over and opened the door for him. A chill wind struck them both, pelting them with tiny raindrops. "I don't understand why you'd want to go outside in weather like this," she commented. "You see how it is, come back inside."
Her argument was never answered. Perdix was already gone.
When he had left, Perdix's only destination had been the indistinct place known as "out." Out was somewhere far away, but close enough that, should he choose, Perdix could return home. Where he found himself three hours later was a little further than just "out."
Now Perdix was wet, muddy, freezing, and probably looked more like a deformed rat than a partridge to the curious eyes that passed him by. He had unknowingly walked all the way downtown and into the most urban area Roanoke could muster. It wasn't much, just some nice restaurants, a food court where nearly everyone who worked in the surrounding office buildings ate lunch, a few antique stores, banks, and a scattering of specialty shops for weekend visitors. It wasn't a place Perdix was terribly familiar with. As a partridge, his traveling in public was severely limited.
Now, though, Perdix could explore a bit more. There were no crowds to step on him and few people who cared about the wild bird's presence. It was a welcome freedom. He began to make his way down the street.
A few streets later, Perdix found himself in a familiar location. It was the park where they had first encountered that odd senshi, General Demantoid. As Perdix surveyed the area, he began to sense something a little odd. It was the same energy as Demantoid's, only much, much weaker. The partridge headed towards the source, pattering along the pathway that wound around the slightly hilly park and past the library, finally ending his stroll at the dumpsters behind the library where a tall man was rummaging for junk.
Perdix almost ignored the man completely before realizing that this was the source of the energy. Upon closer inspection, the figure was found to be wearing a royal purple robe tied with a sequined red belt. Yep, this was definitely the same guy as before.
What was he doing rummaging through a dumpster? Perdix sat down in the bushes and waited.
Eventually, Bjerlo finished his rummaging and produced a banana peel, box of old Chinese food, and a dirty sock. He sniffed at the sock and wrinkled his nose distastefully. "Yigh, I can't believe what passes for food on this planet."
"That's not food."
At the sound of Perdix's voice, Bjerlo dropped his treasure trash and jumped into the air. "Who's there!?"
Slowly, Perdix made his way out of the bushes. Bjerlo's face went from a look of worry to a sneer. "Oh, it's just you, you dumb... thing!" Bjerlo said, unable to attach a word to Perdix's form.
"Partridge. And that wasn't a piece of food, it was a sock."
A blank stare.
"A clothing item worn on the feet."
"Oh, a sock," Bjerlo said as if he had known all along.
"You really don't know what you're doing..."
"What did you say?"
"I said, 'you really don't know what you're doing.'" Perdix cocked his head to one side. "Do you?"
Bjerlo faltered a moment. "Of course I do! I'm Bjerlo Ge'dall'istra, Guardian of Mis'ell'prat, General Demantoid!" he proclaimed.
"Uh huh." A pause. "Do you want some friendly advice?"
"Very well, you may speak," Bjerlo agreed, sounding as if Perdix's very existence depended on his consent.
"If it's food you want, you might try a dumpster behind a restaurant."
"What?"
"This is a library." Realizing Bjerlo might not have an equivalent on his homeworld, Perdix added, "A repository of knowledge. Collection of data and information. It would be a good place to learn more about the planet, but not a good place to find food."
"So where can I find food?"
"Here, follow me. I think I saw a dumpster behind the Indian restaurant back there..." Perdix began to walk away. "Well, you coming?"
"Yes!" Bjerlo practically tripped over himself in his enthusiasm to catch up. Perdix led the man back down the path and to the street, at which point Bjerlo stopped. "I go no further! You are trying to trick me and kill me!"
While that would have been a simply lovely plan, Perdix was really not in the mood to be a guardian at the moment and had no such thing in mind. "No I'm not."
"I know what that line is. That is the line that marks the boundaries of where people may go. There are planet guardian monsters on it."
It was hard to decipher that gibberish, but Perdix managed. "You mean cars?"
"They come in many colors and size and shapes, but they all make hideous noise and they eat people."
"Cars are transports."
"Transports? On land?"
"Yes..."
Bjerlo looked a little less frightened now and took a step out into the street. When nothing happened, he took a few more. Perdix just groaned inwardly and finished crossing.
The unlikely pair made their way into the alley behind the Indian restaurant. Food smells drifted by, intermingled with the gas and oil fumes of cars and the stench of the sewers. Bjerlo seemed not to mind.
Perdix stopped at the foot of the dumpster. "Well, here we are. Dig in. Though I don't know how the food will affect your alien physiology."
"Oh, it'll be fine. The portal adjusts biologicals to suit the climate and society of the planet it leads to. That's how I can speak your language, too." Bjerlo fished out a soggy piece of bread. "Eww." After a quick glance at Perdix, he shrugged and dug his teeth into the smelly carbohydrates. "I can't believe this is how you get your food," the alien mumbled.
"Well, it's not, but unless you've got some money, it's all I can think of for the moment. At least it's not a sock."
Bjerlo made a horrid face as he gulped down the pulverized food. "Yich. Currency? I have this." He held out his hand for inspection. Perdix looked at it curiously.
"What is that?"
"It's a chip, of course! Don't you use chips?"
"Chip as in microchip? You have a microchip embedded in your hand?"
"Well, don't you?"
"In case you hadn't noticed, I don't have any hands..."
"Uhh," Bjerlo agreed. "What to you use, then?"
"Cold, hard cash. Dollar bills and change. We don't have any at the moment."
Now Bjerlo looked even more puzzled. "Transformation?"
Perdix realized Bjerlo didn't know what dollars or change were. Apparently his native language had no equivalent word. Perdix was willing to bet (if he'd had any money to bet with) that Bjerlo would have a few alien words in his vocabulary with no English translation to them that would be just as incomprehensible.
"Well, don't worry about money now. The important thing to focus on are food and shelter."
"Ah, shelter. A mansion?"
"Um, let's stick with something simple to start. Like that abandoned building over there." Perdix stuck a wing out towards a five-story, pepto bismol colored building down the street. It had the words "American Chemical" in faded paint running down the side. Arguably the biggest eyesore in downtown Roanoke, but it was also an important part of local culture and no one had ever thought of tearing it down. Perdix and Sophie had driven by it many a time on the highway.
It took a while for Bjerlo to satiate his hunger, but as soon as he had they were off towards the American Chemical building. Along the way, Bjerlo asked, "Why are you helping me?" At that, Perdix had to stop and wonder himself. It was a long pause.
"I guess," Perdix finally sighed, "that I don't like seeing other people so down on their luck. Even enemies. You're kinda pathetic, you know that? I mean, yeesh, how'd a misfit like you end up here?"
"I'll have you know I am royalty!" Bjerlo instantly hollered. Perdix didn't flinch. Suddenly some thought seemed to strike Bjerlo and he backed off. "I was sent away because I wasn't of any use to the Dark Universalis Senshi where I was."
"Oh," was all Perdix could manage. At that, the two shut up and spent the rest of the walk in silence.
The American Chemical building was truly an awesome behemoth. It sat, large and square, with a single tower of uncertain purpose sticking up from its pink square of a bulk. The windows were boarded and the doors heavily padlocked. People driving on the highway could easily see it was they passed through Roanoke towards other, greater destinations, and it was visible from the entire lower half of downtown. The majority of the building was five stories tall, with the tower adding an additional two to its spindly height for a grand total of seven stories. The parking lot was overgrown with weeds and the place smelled faintly of ecological disaster. It was also deserted. Apparently the homeless people of Roanoke knew of better places to sleep than a building lacking air and heating that smelled fairly bad. Perdix knew of one or two shelters, but those were unavailable at the moment, given the fact neither an alien nor a partridge would be welcome in such a place, much less an alien who also happened to be a major ass and a partridge that could talk. For now, this building would have to do. If only Perdix could get inside.
While Perdix had been thinking, Bjerlo had moved up to the door and was standing in front of it. "Open," the alien commanded. No response. "Open," he said again, slightly louder and with a tinge of anger in his voice.
"The doors aren't automatic," Perdix informed his newfound "friend."
"Well, how are we supposed to get in?"
"I don't know. I didn't think the place was padlocked."
Bjerlo took a strange contraption out of his robes and held it up. It was about the size of his palm and metallic in color. As Perdix watched the device unfolded, enveloping Bjerlo's fingers in a silky metal, which Bjerlo then used to rip a large gash in the door.
Needless to say, Perdix was impressed. Bjerlo seemed somehow disappointed. "What is this crap?" he demanded. "Far too soft to be useful for any security!"
"Steel," muttered Perdix. Bjerlo squeezed in through the gash he had torn, Perdix following quickly before anyone spotted them. Thankfully the entrance faced away from the road and the prying eyes of motorists.
Inside it was dry and dusty, a fine layer of dirt covering every available surface. Discarded chairs and desks were pushed up against the wall and a hallway led off into a maze of other rooms. Perdix and Bjerlo spent the rest of the day exploring the interior and eventually chose a windowless room on the third floor to call home. Bjerlo continually complained, but once they had furnished the room with some of the chairs and a bed made from an emergency blanket found in a closet the room seemed much friendlier.
"Well," Perdix said.
"What now?"
"I guess that's it for today."
"I should kill you, you know."
"Yeah, I know. We're supposed to be enemies, but with friends like ours, who needs enemies?"
It was a sobering thought. Bjerlo quietly asked, "What did your friends do to you?"
Perdix turned his head towards the wall. "Not friends. I don't really have any friends. The senshi team I'm on, well, they don't really like me, and the girl I'm living with really hates my guts. What about you?"
"Yes, I think my comrades and I are like that, too. They say I'm not useful to the ilgenndr."
"The what?"
"The ilgenndr, the organization, the totality, the whole."
"I see."
More silence passed. "So this is chaos," Bjerlo remarked.
"I guess so."
"The Dark Universalis Senshi shall bring order to chaos. I need to prepare for her arrival."
Perdix couldn't think of anything to say, so just watched as Bjerlo took out a cylinder about the size of his finger and began to twist it. It emitted a beeping noise and a small purple light began to flash. Bjerlo seemed satisfied with the result and placed the object on the floor. Curious, Perdix asked, "What's that?"
"It's a communication device, one that will summon the others of the Dark Universe. Then we shall bring order to your world and you will experience a time greater than ever before!"
Bjerlo was talking like he was brainwashed; Perdix didn't doubt for a minute that he was. He wasn't going to interfere, though. At least not yet.
"When will they be here?"
"I don't know. No one has ever done this before." That seemed to be a crippling thought to Bjerlo, who sat back on the blanket and clasped his hands together. Perdix again chose to say nothing. Eventually, they both fell asleep on the same blanket.